The kitten does not want to sit in your arms

Some people have the opinion that cats do not need to be taught to be handled, since they themselves are ready to sit on their owners’ laps for hours. But it is not always the case. Many owners dream of having this purring miracle sitting in their arms, because they so want to stroke and cuddle the kitten, and everyone knows that our pets are a good antidepressant.

They, with their characteristic arrogance, allow themselves to be fed, cared for, but as for their hands... Moreover, this applies not only to an adult taken home, but also to a cat raised with their own hands, groomed from a tiny kitten. In our article we will try to explain in detail what causes this cat behavior and how to accustom a cat to handling.

Reasons why a cat doesn't like to be held

Animal psychologists say that there are some good reasons why cats do not like to sit in their owner's arms. Let's look at some of them:

• Firstly, it is difficult to sit a kitten in your arms that has lived on the street for a long time. If no one has ever held him in their arms before, he will sincerely not understand why he needs to sit on his master’s lap. Well, they fed me, gave me something to drink, but why these incomprehensible hugs?
• The cat does not like to be without balance, in weightlessness, this is exactly how the pet perceives this situation when it is at the height of human height.
• There are cats that are afraid of heights.
• Bad memories do not allow the kitten to relax and calmly sit on its owner’s lap. If the animal is a street animal or from a family where it was not treated particularly well, or, on the contrary, was abused, then it will be difficult for it to adapt to a new relationship. The cat's memory has a completely different picture of what can be expected from human hands.
• The pungent odor emanating from the owner may not allow the cat to sit in his arms. As you know, cats have a highly developed sense of smell; their delicate nose perceives even the most insignificant odors. Those odors that come from the owner's hands can be pungent and extremely unpleasant for him. It could be the smell of washing powder, detergent, hand cream, or your favorite French perfume.
• There are also some especially freedom-loving breeds that do not tolerate “calf” tenderness, an abundance of communication and the master’s hands. They prefer solitude. These cats are good for busy business people who are rarely at home. These are breeds such as the British, Scottish Fold.

Features of some breeds

It is known that cats of some breeds are more difficult to make contact with humans, preferring solitude and freedom. These types of cats who do not like to be cuddled and cuddled include:

• British Shorthair. Doesn't like to be held, but is patient. It will tolerate your caresses until you decide to let the animal go.
• American Shorthair. Very willful and independent. If she sits on her arms, it will only be when she wants to.
• Scottish fold and straight eared. Aristocratic, calm and independent. Not very affectionate, it can bite particularly clingy children.
• Burmese. Gentle and calm cats. They can allow themselves to be stroked, but will not tolerate rough treatment or squeezing.
• Siberian. Friendly and playful, but not very affectionate. Not affectionate, but not aggressive either. With self-esteem...
• Norwegian forest. He will never sit on his hands. Maximum - next to you. You can stroke it, but under no circumstances squeeze it.
• Russian blue. Calm, playful, cheerful. Doesn't like guests, hides. Prefers to simply “be present” next to a person than affection and tenderness.
• Maine Coon. Very attached to the owner, like dogs, but not intrusive. He considers sitting on his hands beneath his dignity.

They may enjoy playing with you and being around you, but won't suffer too much when you're away for long periods of time, as long as there's enough food in the bowl. These cats are willful, know their worth, and will not allow themselves to be treated like a toy. To gain their trust, you will have to work hard.

How not to behave around a cat

Cats are quite freedom-loving and touchy creatures. If the owner has ever offended the cat, the cat will never approach him again. And you can’t even dream of him jumping onto your lap. If the cat receives affection and attention from the owner, then gradually he will get used to the person and respond with mutual affection.

It should be remembered that cats will never do anything against their will. There is no need to forcefully hold them on your knees; this still will not lead to the desired result. The animal itself must want to sit or sleep on its owner’s lap.

If a small kitten tolerates the owner’s caresses normally, then at the first sign of anxiety, it should be released. When the animal begins to nervously beat its tail on the floor, it says that I’m tired, I have a lot of things to do.

Psychological atmosphere

The cat will sit in your arms in a calm state and environment. Noise, loud television, screams and scandals cause him tension and he does not want to sit in anyone's arms. The cat does not like to sit in the arms of some people who smoke, who are aggressive even towards them, who abuse alcoholic beverages, or who are sloppy. It happens that she categorically does not accept a family member and this cannot be changed. You can only gradually teach a cat to sit in your arms if you treat her with care and affection, avoiding coercion, and then sooner or later she will reciprocate and affectionately.

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Some training methods

If you are not one of those lucky people whose cats love to sit or even sleep in your arms, and you really want your pet to be “tame,” then you need to know that there are different ways to help tame this wild miracle:

• All cats love to eat tasty food, and it is better for a well-fed, dozing kitten to allow itself to be taken on your lap.
• An affectionate monotonous conversation with a pet encourages mutual communication. He, listening to the owner’s gentle speeches, will begin to squint and squint. In this state of mind, the pet will jump into the owner's arms.
• Animal psychology claims that a cat should get used to being handled gradually, in several stages. First you just need to pet her behind the ear, all cats adore this. Once the pet is near your palms, you do not need to grab it and hold it by force.
• You can act with the help of treats. At first, you can feed the kitten by hand, then put the yummy food on your lap. He will certainly jump after her. At the stage when your pet, having jumped up for a tasty treat, is in no hurry to jump back, but calmly eats it, you can try stroking it with your other hand. You shouldn’t hold him back by jumping on your lap over and over again; he will get used to it; giving him a treat will help instill in his master’s hands how to receive pleasure.
• If your cat is afraid of heights and weightlessness, then look at how correctly you are holding it and whether it is experiencing a feeling of pain. When lifting a kitten, you cannot hold it by the withers or by the body near the ribs. You need to hold the armpits of the front paws with one hand, and place the other under the hind paws. This way he won't feel like he's floating in the air.
• If the kitten is terribly afraid of heights, then first you can pick him up while sitting on your knees.
• Often the rapprochement between the owner and the cat occurs during play. At first, you can play with a bow or wrapper on the floor, gradually bringing the toy closer to your lap. As soon as the pet is in your arms, you need to let go of the toy and leave it under the full control of the animal. While he is enjoying the caught prey, he himself, without realizing it, is in his arms and at an unconscious level there is a period of adaptation.
• Some owners carry very small kittens in the pockets of terry dressing gowns; they sit there like kangaroos and get used to the owner’s smell. In the meantime, he will perceive the robe as his property, and the owner's smell will always be associated with the sweet period of childhood.
• As a last resort, pet stores have cat sprays with a high content of pheromones, which attract pets like a magnet. If you spray your palms with this miraculous method, the cat itself will reach out to you. You should not use this product often, because, against the background of pheromones, it will become addictive and then another problem will arise: how to wean your pet off cat spray. Catnip can be substituted for cat spray.

You need to understand that a kitten gets used to its owner’s hands faster than an adult cat; in the latter case, more patience will be required.

Knowing the free-thinking and independent nature of a cat, you can get along with your pet without much difficulty. If you still cannot achieve the desired result, then you need to leave it alone. After all, cats are quite characteristic animals, and character, as we know, changes throughout life.

Why won't my cat be picked up?

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It's no secret that purring pets are bought for comfort and affection. Indeed, it is an incomparable happiness when a mustachioed pet climbs onto the owner’s lap, begins to sing his famous song and cuddle. Many cats have nothing against cuddles. You can calmly pick them up, caress them and stroke them. Moreover, the animals themselves seem to experience great pleasure.

However, there are cats in the world that cannot stand “cuddles” and other hot hugs. They will never jump on their knees. Finally, they use their teeth and claws when someone tries to pick them up. The owners are disappointed - how could this happen? Have there been any problems? Maybe we got a “special” pet? Let's figure it out.

Negative experience. It's no secret that cats are vindictive animals. They wrap their heads around literally everything. Both good and bad. Moreover, cats always quickly draw conclusions from what happened. It is possible that one of the household members handled the animal in an extremely unfortunate manner and caused pain. This was enough to form negative associations.

Natural instincts. Let's not forget that by nature cats are born hunter-predators. Despite the millennia that have passed since domestication, purrs have retained many wild habits. Let's put aside emotions and think: what self-respecting predator would put up with the way they unceremoniously grab you and start squeezing and shaking you? So there is no need to be offended: cats, in whom wild instincts turn out to be tenacious, perceive human caresses as an encroachment on their own freedom. To complete the picture, remember how your pet behaves in “normal mode”. If he spends time calmly in your company, even purrs under his side (but not in your arms) - know: he is still a semi-wild animal. And hugs are not his profile.

Self-esteem. A small example from life. You are helping a seven-year-old child get dressed. Just like that, by inertia - after all, children are always small for parents. But the seven-year-old proudly refuses help: “I’m already big.” That's right: each of us has a sense of self-worth. Cats are no exception. We can accept some help and care, but some we consider excessive care. Cats favorably accept the benefits of home life: delicious food, attention, care. But take it in your arms - excuse me. Your cat respects itself too much for this. She has grown up - in front of you is no longer a small, pliable kitten. Solution: the mustachioed pet won’t be picked up – don’t. Don't insist. Perhaps he will come to this yet, but only on his own, without outside help.

Mistrust and doubt in people. This often happens when a fairly adult pet is adopted into a home - for example, from a shelter. “Foster” and shelter animals, as a rule, have a complex and difficult past. It is difficult for them to adapt to new conditions and learn to trust previously unfamiliar people. The way out: complete freedom for the pet. Let him rest peacefully, slowly get to know the house and people. The cat will definitely choose close people whom it can trust.

Physical pain. Let's move on to the most unpleasant moment. Your pet may experience real physical pain. Cats usually skillfully disguise all their sores and illnesses, doing their best to pretend that “everything is fine.” The fragile idyll is destroyed when the owner takes the pet in his hands and inadvertently touches sore or sensitive areas. Be wary if your previously affectionate cat suddenly begins to hiss, scratch and refuse to be handled. We advise you not to wait for negative scenarios, but to immediately show the animal to a veterinarian.

Material used: Why Doesn't My Cat Like To Be Held? Source: cattitudedaily.com Photo: from open sources.

How to accustom a cat to your hands

It is better to teach a cat to sit on your arms from an early age. Adults have an already established character and it is extremely difficult to retrain them.

Accustoming should be gradual and not cause a negative reaction in the cat. If she breaks free and runs away, do not interfere with her and do not insist on your own, so as not to cause even greater rejection. If you hold a cat by force, it will become afraid of people, hide, bite and scratch as soon as you reach out to it.

If you get a pet that is not at all tame, start from afar: as you pass by, stroke the cat with your fingertips. When she gets used to this and won’t run away when she sees you, you can start stroking her fur with your hand.

Feeding from the palm of your hand and rewarding him with some kind of treat after ironing will help the animal get used to your hands. You can put catnip on your palms to associate your hands with something pleasant.

When the cat allows itself to be stroked without fear, you can try to pick it up, sit it on your lap and stroke it. Perhaps at first she will run away. Don't try to hold her back. Patience and affection on your part will help your cat feel safe and relaxed. After some time, she will happily jump into your arms, cuddle and purr.

In any case, if your cat does not yet share your desire to hold her in your arms, do not be upset, this does not mean that she does not love you. She's just a cat.

Ways to train an outdoor cat to use a litter box

A street cat has appeared in the house - provide the pet with the necessary equipment. Place for sleeping - basket, box, bowls, box for toileting. The potty is the hardest thing for an animal to get used to.

Place the cat litter in a place where the animal can access it 24 hours a day. But don't place the pot in plain sight. Cats prefer to relieve themselves in secluded places.

If the size of the room allows, organize an enclosure for the cat. Place bowls, a box of sand, and a carrier there. The animal will get used to the new environment in 1–2 days. Make sure your pet relieves itself. Cats may have problems with defecation due to stress. If the animal refuses to defecate, place a second toilet outside the enclosure and allow the animal access to it.

For the first week, use sand and soil as filler. If you took an animal from the yard, take soil from the places where the cat relieved itself. To create natural conditions, add grass and hay to the tray. Leave the stones and rubbish behind.

In winter, you won’t be able to collect sand and soil - pour sawdust into the cat litter. It is easier for an outdoor cat to adapt to this type of litter.

Send your pet to the tray 1.5 - 2 hours after feeding when you notice restless behavior. The cat rushes from corner to corner, sniffs the floor, furniture, scratches the linoleum and carpet with its paw - the animal is looking for a place to toilet.

Method 1

The pet did not go to the potty - do not scream or hit the animal. Express your complaints in a stern tone. Collect traces of the disaster with a paper towel and place them in the cat litter box. Wipe up the puddle, put a wet rag, a napkin in a box with sand.

Send the cat to the litter box, explain: they relieve themselves in the potty. Leave the “surprises” in it for a while. The animal will begin to associate the sand box with a place to defecate due to the smell of excrement.

Wash the “accident” area and add a strong-smelling product to the water. Citrus essential oils, table vinegar, and wormwood infusion are suitable. Cats react calmly to bleach and shit in inappropriate places after treatment.

Method 2

The pet stubbornly relieves itself in one place, ignoring the box, make a compromise. Move the pot to this place. The cat will start going to the potty, gradually move the toilet in the desired direction. After 3–4 days, move the tray 10–15 centimeters.

How to hand train a kitten

Teach your kitten to sit in your arms from childhood - from 4-6 weeks of age. Such early socialization will benefit the pet - it will be calmer and more trusting towards people.

How to accustom a cat to handling from “childhood”:

1. Reward with treats. Feed only after you pick up the kitten and stroke it. This is how a positive expectation of contact is developed and reinforced.
2. Iron more often.
   This behavior will develop in the animal an understanding: human hands, in addition to food, provide care and safety. Pet your kitten often
3. Gently stroke the kitten when it sleeps, teach it to fall asleep in your arms. Your pet will associate you with protection and shelter.
4. You can pet a sleepy kitten. Take him in your arms and try to make him perceive you as protection and refuge.
5. Your kitten may be irritated by your touch. Just like an adult cat. Do not force the owl's company on him - let the animal go for a walk.
6. If the kitten asks to be held, do not send it away. Respond to the affection, spending at least a couple of minutes to reinforce the conditioned reflex.

The stuffed animal is in good hands

You need to lift the kitten correctly: supporting it with one palm under the stomach, the other under the butt, while the tail is gently pressed between the legs. Movements should be smooth and careful. It is better not to pick up a kitten by the scruff of the neck - only the mother cat determines a safe place with 100% probability.

Table 1. When and how to pick up a cat.

You can accustom an adult animal to contact with the help of unique exercises. To begin, simply slowly place your palm on the cat’s side and remove it just as slowly, then treat your pet with a treat. After a few days, place your other hand on the cat's other side, continuing to reinforce the training with treats. As soon as the cat gets used to it and is no longer afraid of the touch, begin to lightly press the sides with your palms, as if you were going to lift the pet. Repeat the exercise until the animal begins to perceive your touch as something familiar.